10 steps to raise a happy child

The complexity of today's parenting makes it important to develop some basic principles to guide parents and emphasize the basic concepts that can help parents achieve happy and reach children. Here are the ten best steps to summarize the basic principles to help parents raise a happy child.

1. Praise moderately to avoid pressure; Postpone Super-Praise

Praise conveys your values ​​to your children and sets expectations on them. No praise conveys the message that you do not believe in them. Reasonable praise, such as "good thinker", "hard worker", "smart", "creative", "strong", "kind" and "sensitive" sets high expectations that are within your child's reach. Words like "perfect", "best", "most beautiful" and "brilliant" set impossible expectations.

Children internalize these expectations and expectations become pressure when the children find that they cannot achieve the high goals.

2. Do not discuss children's problem behaviors within their hearing

Discussions about children also set expectations on them. If they hear you talk to grandparents and friends about how jealous or meaningful they are or how shy or scared they are, or if you refer to them as "little devils" or "ADHD children" they assume you are telling the truth and believe that they cannot control these problem behaviors.

3. Take command; Do not monitor your children

Your children need leadership and boundaries to feel secure. Refer the letter V. When children are young, they are at the base of V with few choices, little freedom and small responsibilities that go with that size. As they grow, give them more choices, more freedom and more responsibility. Their boundaries remain. Children will feel trusted.

If you turn that V and children are given too many early choices and freedoms, they feel empowered too soon. They violate rules and responsibilities and feel as if you are taking away their freedom. They expect to be treated as adults before they are ready. They became angry, depressed and rebellious.

4. Build Elasticity Don't save your child from reality

Although children need to develop sensitivity, overprotection of addiction and hypersensitivity encourages. You can be kind without being oversized. Your children will need to learn to recover from losses and failures, and resilience will allow them to overcome obstacles.

5. Bo United, be willing to compromise and say good things about your child's other parent

Leaders in a family leading in two opposite directions confuse children. Children will not respect parents who do not show respect for each other. Turning your child's other parent into an "ogre" or "dummy" will make you feel like a good parent temporarily, but your sabotage will be fired and your children will no longer respect any of you. This is especially difficult after divorce, but it is even more important in divided families.

6. Keep teachers, education and learning with great regard; Make your children's education a priority

This ideal becomes clearer if they hear how much you value. Tell them about the best teachers you had and raise their teachers as well. Set expectations of higher education early so they will assume that education does not end after high school.

7. Be positive about your own work and that of your child's other parent

If you walk in the door and complain about your work daily, your children will be children at work. They will complain about their school work and household chores. If you do not like your work, try to find better work and remind them that education gives more job choices.

8. Be a role model for ethics, activity and hard work

Find other good role models for your children. Your children are watching you. As you "get away" progress, hold too much change, or are disrespectful to your mother (their grandmother), they will notice. When you are interesting and energetic, they become equally impressed.

You can be a good role model without being perfect, but your flaws are displayed. You don't have to do everything. Introduce your children to friends and mentors who will also be positive influences.

9. Enjoy learning experiences with your child

Too many parents of twenty-year-olds have been sitting in my office because they couldn't find time for their children when they were growing up. Make time to learn with your children, and they will be teachers forever. You will not regret it, just memories.

10. Keep a separate fun time and adult status without giving adult status for a short time

Enjoy adult life without your children. Weekdays and a few adult vacations a year will keep you excited about life. Give your children something to look forward to. They can watch and wait and do children's activities with the family. Children who receive adult privileges have responsibilities beyond their maturity.